Thoughtiness

It is strange how I go through writing droughts. I went on a walk today and I was thinking in prose and I thought to myself, "I guess my writing drought is over". So here I am writing on my blog because I don't know anywhere else to write these thoughts down.

My brain has been moving at the speed of light for the past couple of weeks. I think I may have finally found the source and the reason why. It all started about a month ago. I was on my way to work just like most mornings in my week. This morning however, I had a thought. This thought is the type of thought that I am afraid to say just might be one of those life changing moments. The thought was tentative, but assured. Just three little letters P....H.....D. I didn't want them to come, but they did. I can't make them go back, and I can't get my mind to change itself.

Like I said ever since those three innocent looking letters entered my brain it has been going crazy. I practically have a dissertation topic picked out and the introduction already started. My brain is so inconsiderate, never once did it stop and ask me what I wanted, or even give me the time to catch up and get used to the idea.

The one defense I did have was not to say those three letters out loud. I thought to myself (when my brain wasn't listening) if I don't verbalize what my brain is thinking there is no way that it will happen. My one little defense however was useless because it seemed that my brain was talking with other brains when I wasn't paying attention and he (why is my brain male? It makes no sense to me) leaked the secret, and before I knew it everyone I talked to was bring up the subject.

I couldn't say no, I couldn't get away. I am moving full force in the forward direction being driven by a force beyond myself. I don't even know who Cambree Johnson is anymore. Another being has taken control of my body and is reeking havoc without my permission. This is what happens to me in the spring time when I think that my life is going to settle down for awhile. Bam! Something intense hits me and my life is all awhirl again and I don't know which way is up and which is down.

Brain's are funny creatures and I wish I knew how to train them better. It sure would make life a whole lot easier.